Any Major Dad Will Tell You: Jim

The next contestant on ‘Any Major Dad Will Tell You’ is one of the smartest guys I know, and one of the few guys I went to college with that are actually using his education in his career. I met Jim through my friend Greg who also happened to be college roommates with yesterday’s contestant, C.C. Chapman.

Jim is the father of two boys, 5 and 3, and lives with his wife and sons in a suburb of Boston. He was kind enough to spend a few minutes answering my questions, so, without further adieu, I’m pleased to introduce a man with whom I’m proud to share a birthday – Jim.

RMDM: How has being a father changed your life?

Jim: How hasn’t it changed my life?! Let’s see on my schedule. First, working out at 4:30 in the AM so that I can get a good workout in and still be ready to get the kids awake, changed, have a snack and then drop off at daycare so I can hit the 7:30 train. Second, coming home, feeding the kids, bathing them, playing with them (which I do rather enjoy a good game of checkers where I let my 5 year-old win…don’t tell him that, though!), and then getting them to bed. Then there is the need to take a week “vacation” in May every year so that my wife and I can actually get stuff done around the house (with the kids in day care, of course).

But those are just the “costs”. The benefits come from the endless kisses and I love you’s and all the priceless comments that really just help to make my life that much more special. These two boys look up to me like I’m a God (will the real God please help them!!). Big shoes to fill, but my 5 year old likes to put me in my place. When I tell him to eat his vitamins so he can be big and strong like daddy, he says “Your not that strong… Paul Bunyan is strong”. How can I compete with that???

RMDM: What characteristic do you possess that you hope your children inherit?

Jim: Well, I hope they don’t inherit my short-term memory… or lack thereof! I hope that they inherit my philosophy of “Do unto others as you’d have others do unto you.” Treat people well, and they will treat you well back.

Also, I want them to work hard so that they can earn what they get. There are no handouts (well, there shouldn’t be anyways!), so you need to earn your keep. Work your tail off and be happy in what your doing.

RMDM: Are there any specific life lessons that are important for you as a father to pass on?

Jim: The value of a buck! I’m about as frugal as they come, but I came from a very modest family of Italian immigrants where my mom and dad worked hard to give my brother, sister and I a roof over our head and a great education. We didn’t go out on major vacations (I didn’t get to Disney World until I was 22 years old!), and we barely ate out. We were the last on the block to get cable, a microwave oven and Nintendo. But that’s taught me a lot, and I hope to pass that down to my boys.

RMDM: What has been your proudest moment as a father so far?

Jim: Hmmm….tough one. Maybe the fact that my 5 year old knows all the players on the Red Sox and the Celtics? Kidding.

It’s all the little things he learns along the way that I helped him with. First steps, first words, reading, writing, math skills (as an accountant, I loved that!). I’m helping to teach and build him up, so any time he shows me what he learns, it’s a proud moment. I remember he was around 4 to 4 1/2 years old at the zoo, and we ran into a school friend and his parents. He read a sign that said bear, and the other mother was amazed he could read. I said “Oh, he has been taking reading classes at day care and he knows small words.” He then proceeded to read the sign for “Snow Leopard” out loud, to which the mom said “that’s not a ‘small word’!”. Very happy that he is taking learning to heart and is doing well with it.

Oh, and scoring 7 goals in his first soccer game this spring was a mix of pride with a tinge of embarrassment that he hasn’t yet learned to pass the ball!

RMDM: Describe your perfect Father’s Day.

Jim: Enjoying a day of relaxing with my kids and my wife, barbecuing some meat for lunch, hanging on the back porch watching the kids play in the yard (not killing each other, please!), and then getting out there and pitching to them to teach them to hit the ball. Simple, but relaxing (again, as long as they are not screaming and beating each other up!).

Any day involving grilled meat and playing catch sounds good to me. Thank you to Jim for playing along and I hope he enjoys a relaxing Father’s Day with his family.