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So yesterday Tiger Woods kinda, sorta confirmed the speculation that had been swirling around him since the fender bender heard round the world. Without making any clarifying statements he admitted to transgressions and that he failed his family.
With the pressure on after some very poorly crafted media statements issued by him regarding the accident and his wife’s ‘courageousness’ it was only a matter of time before we heard something resembling the truth. Once word leaked of another woman who this time had some damaging evidence in the form of a voice mail from El Tigre himself the match was over.
However, his admission and apology also managed to come with an admonishment for the media. As intelligent as he is, he can’t possibly be that surprised. Still, if his naivete is really that strong, I believe Jim Rome said it best: “If you don’t want the media in ur biz, stop fueling up the G5 and stay home.”
Even the great moral compass that is John Daly has spoken up about Tiger’s situation and urged him to come clean. How far have you fallen when John Daly of all people provides sobering advice?
Shortly after all of this mess occurred I saw a few stories asking the question “what would his father think?”. Woods obviously had a very close relationship with his late father and it made me think of of how I’ve tried to live my life according to a few simple rules that have evolved as my roles and responsibilities have changed.
As a young adult my biggest goal was to make sure that if whatever I did in my life were to become public that it wouldn’t make my own mother ashamed to admit I was her son. As soon as I met my wife that rule expanded to include her. And, finally, that rule has grown again to encompass my role as a father, as I want my son to always be proud to admit that I am his dad.
Have I always been successful in accomplishing this? No. I’m human and have had my transgressions, both private and public. For me the lowest point was when I became embroiled in an SEC investigation into the accounting practices of a former employer, which completely changed the way I viewed my career and the direction of my life.
Sure, it may seem easy for me to sit here and pass judgment without the pressure of being a billion dollar athlete and one of the most recognized personalities in the world. However, the fact remains that whatever Tiger did represents the antithesis of what being a good man is all about.
Today Washington Post sportswriter Michael Wilbon, who I ordinarily like, offered up a pathetic column trying to rationalize Tiger’s purported transgressions, even invoking the Chris Rock line that “a man is only faithful as his options”. While Rock’s line is funny, the reality is that it must be viewed in context.
Lots of men, even those that aren’t celebrities, have options, but they don’t act on temptation without intent. They may have plenty of opportunity to betray the trust they have built with their spouses, still they chose to not violate it.
If the time line being reported by the media is even remotely accurate, then it means Woods has been straying from his marriage practically from the beginning. Even though marriages break apart for a number of reasons, the fact that his wanderlust was so instantaneous it makes you wonder what kind of message his purported actions will send to his own children?
As men and fathers what we should take away from Tiger’s situation is the reinforcement of the idea that celebrities should never serve as role models for us or our children. While I’m not a fan of the sport, I’ve always appreciated Tiger’s talent, work ethic and commitment to his game, but we shouldn’t allow things like championships, wealth and fame to cloud the lessons we intend to impart to our children.
Another aspect to this story that may never been fully revealed is what actually happened to cause the crash, as many outlets have run rampant with speculation that there may have been an incident of domestic violence. I only bring this up because of some of the disturbing comments I’ve seen out there on the internet praising his wife for what very might well be an assault.
If the situation was reversed and it was a man who had allegedly assaulted his wife I can guarantee these same commenters would be screaming for justice, and rightfully so. Any man that raises a hand to a woman in anger is a coward, not a man. However, we as a society should never condone violence in any form, if this is in fact what happened.
This post is part of a Dad Bloggers Project over at Dad-Blogs. Click on over to check out other dad’s perspectives on Tiger Woods.
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